Circumcision du Soleil

Warning, this post will cause blurred vision, loss of appetite, and spurts of anger and laughter. The word PENIS is frequently used, and with reckless abandon. I figure that this post will be a circus, and may even cause some “oohs” and “aahs” to the point of getting traffic up again. It seems that every time I post something interesting, a lot of anonymous people come out of the wood work. So here it is. Jae ran and Sue were piqued when I mentioned on another blog that I could always make a post on something less controversial than TRA and KAD and all that other CRAP (clueless rantings of adopted peoples). BTW…if you’re new to my blog, that was sarcastic. I don’t think adoptees or even APs rant cluelessly. They tend to do so with at least half a clue, which is twice more than others. I, on the other hand, often blog clueless, and shameless, and even pantless. Segue. Enter stage left: Typical American Teenage Male He walks into bathroom and sees two other men standing at the urinals. The teenage male pauses before choosing the one furthest from the other two men, who are also standing at least two urinals apart. There is no dialogue in this scene. There is no eye contact. The unspoken rule is, don’t speak, don’t look. He hesitates and wonders, if I shake it more than twice, am I masturbating? Enter stage right: Man in white business suit (Dr. Kellogg – who looks strangely like the KFC Colonel) “This scene is common in our youth today. Young boys must be taught that masturbation is unhealthy and can cause mental and physical ailments. In order to curb this, I’ve recommended circumcision.” Fade in photo of baby being circumcised. Dr. Kellogg: As you can see, the pain the baby feels will help the baby associate the penis with pain and not with pleasure. Therefore, we’ll produce more clean and mindful young men who can work without having their brains rattled by sex all the time. Flash forward 100 years to a typical high school Two boys whisper to each that they just got laid this weekend. They are staring at the girl in front of them, which neither finds pretty, but can’t help wondering what she looks like naked. Both boys feel a twinge of pain in their circumcised penises. They no longer desire this girl, and no longer think of sex for the rest of the day. Okay, so this isn’t exactly what happens or happened. But, it is true that Dr. Kellogg, the genius he was, insisted that circumcision would reduce masturbation. If it reduced it, then I can’t even imagine how often boys were doing it when they weren’t being circumcised on a regular basis. I mean, ask the typical man around, circumcised or not, and they’ll say they could have masturbated several times a day and still been okay with doing it a couple more times. Morning, afternoon, night. It’s almost more regular than eating. So what’s with America’s obsession with circumcision? I’m not sure. But, in a day when nearly every medical professional association, except those headed by doctors who perform the surgery, now recognize that it is a completely unnecessary operation, and can in fact promote disease and unhygienic conditions, I'm not sure why it is still being done. Take for example the African AIDS study done on circumcised men. In one study, which was universally agreed to be seriously flawed, circumcision was found to have decreased the risk of AIDS. But, in other studies, done more scientifically and with actual reproducible results (the one clear scientific standard of tests) discovered that circumcising men actually increased the risk of contracting HIV/AIDS. Why? The study found that men who were circumcised preferred not to use a condom over those men who were not circumcised. Why? Because men who were circumcised complained of desensitization of their glans, and therefore wearing a condom further reduced their pleasure factor and created an additional barrier. So they would rarely wear a condom. Why? Because when the glans is subject to constant stimulation and rubbing against of underwear, pubic hair, and other material, the glans becomes hardened and scarred. This reduces the sensitivity of the nerve endings. This causes men to lose sensation in their penis. Not good. So there must be some like health benefit, right? Cleanliness? Disgusting mold or growth? Anthrax producing in that foreskin? Nope. Sorry, not true. Especially the Anthrax part. Although that’d be a good name for a revival Anthrax band. Anthrax Restored! Listen, keeping a penis clean is pretty complicated: Step 1. Use water. Step 2. Use soap. Step 3. Rinse. Okay, so maybe a baby can’t do that! How do you keep a baby’s penis clean? First, a baby’s penis is supposed to stay intact. In fact, the foreskin isn’t supposed to retract for several years (2 – 4), allowing the penis to protect itself. If you try to pull the foreskin back, it can do extreme harm and cause serious pain. But, that is exactly what they do when they circumcise a baby boy. Do they use pain killers? NO. They rarely use any type of anesthesia. Wow, isn’t that cruel? YES! Okay, look, my rant against circumcision is this. It’s just mean. It’s completely unnatural to cut off a body part at birth. And ladies, a man with an intact penis needs less, um…encouragement. Have you ever had that one guy who just wouldn’t, you know….um… And that brings me to Viagra and circumcision. In countries where circumcision is not performed regularly, sales of Viagra per capita are extremely low. But in America, where circumcision is still done on more than 50% of boys, sales of Viagra are off the chart. Ever wonder why this could be? Is this an anomaly? Doubtful. Circumcision reports indicate that the operation can often lead to erectile dysfunction later in life. Therefore, we Americans are subject to watching countless commercials during football games (manly) of how unmanly we are if we can't keep our erections (wilted flowers). So we buy medicine and suddenly we're able to sit in a bathtub on the edge of a cliff holding hands with our spouse, and we're able to hit the golf ball real far with our super big driver, and we're able to throw that perfect spiral right into that tire hole. God, I love subliminal advertising! There are other health risks associated with circumcision. In fact, studies show that circumcising babies actually costs more in the long run for the child. This will result in later surgeries (10 percent have corrective surgery), doctor visits, and even some who ask for foreskin restoration. Did you know there are cases where babies died from complications from circumcision? Did you know that penile disfigurement is often a direct result from circumcision? But it’s just skin! Wrong again. In fact, the foreskin is a protect covering that houses millions (yes millions) of specialized nerve endings that cause sensations of pleasure. Right beneath the foreskin is the frenulum which attaches the foreskin to the glans. All of this is the primary erogenous zone for men. The glans is NOT the primary erogenous zone of the penis. Do you hear that? How many licks does it take to get to the inside of a tootsie pop? It doesn't matter if you got an intact man! Guys who have sex without their foreskin may think they’re on top of the world. But that’d be like driving a Kia every day of the week because you just didn’t know that the Aston Martin DB8 was in existence. Having sex circumcised is like watching a black and white TV without a remote. You don’t know it’s any better until you see that plasma screen television with digital surround sound. So not only are men walking around with their odd looking penises (imagine a finger with the nail ripped off), they’re having sex with the secondary erogenous zone. Not fun at all. Some people claim that slicing and dicing the foreskin (which is actually what they do) will prevent infections, UTIs, cancer, and other things. This is so incredibly rare and so incredibly unfounded that it would be like removing a girl’s breasts when they first developed just in case she later developed breast cancer. Hey, if you don’t have breasts, then you can’t develop the cancer. So let’s play it safe, and just cut them off! Okay, and here it is. This is the biggie. But, my boy will be made fun of for not having his penis look like everyone else, and men prefer it that way. Firstly, boys aren’t always staring at other people’s penises (remember our opening bathroom scene). Boys don't often share their penises with each other. And often times, it is at a young age when sexuality isn't even a factor (see below story). Secondly, if men preferred it circumcised, then the majority of the men in the world would do it. But, the good thing is that the vast majority of men are intact. Why this obsession with the way a penis looks? PORNOGRAPHY (here come the Google hits!) I wonder if Iraq and Afghanistan, two Muslim countries that even cover up women in miniskirts on magazines, realize that with democracy and freedom, comes pornography and the temptation of flesh. Seriously, what is probably democracies greatest import? Sin. The advent of the internet has made pornography available to all and to anyone. The rise in raunch culture has lead to the rise in plastic surgeries in women and men. Girls are having breast implants done at younger ages, women are doing complete body waxes, some ladies go do anal bleaching, and even others do more extreme things like plastic surgery on their labia. All in order to make themselves more like that porn star their husband or boyfriend so adores. At the same time, men are seeing what they perceive to be the desirable man. Abnormally large penis (don’t trust a man who says average is 7 when all studies say 4.5 – 5”) with red glans erect and uncircumcised. But these men, who practice sex daily (with that less than sensitive penile glans) make men also feel sexually inferior. Why aren’t I that big? Why doesn’t my penis look that nice? Why don’t I last that long? I mean, have you ever had sex for 30 minutes? It can actually be kind of painful and you start to get that not-so fresh feeling, and that ride-me-raw feeling… So men, see this massive specimen (the TV adds 10 inches, I mean pounds) and think, this is what I should be like. And they’re glad they are, because the girlfriends and wives have probably seen the same video, and may have never had sex with an intact man (case histories indicated that intact men have happier partners). And so they continue this “tradition” with their son, and their son is indoctrinated into the same system of male sexual discovery (ie. Playboy magazines and Penthouse and Hustler and the internet) and lo and behold, the American obsession with circumcision continues. Why is this on an adoption blog? When I was about 5, my mother caught me showing my willy to my friend, who showed me his willy. This willy nilly play was part of growing up. Nearly all boys go through some stage of showing off. My mom sat me down and told me that some people are circumcised, where they cut off the foreskin. This sounded painful. She said I wasn't because in Korea people didn't do that. It wasn't part of the culture or even done on a regular basis. She asked me if I wanted it done, so I could look like my father and my brother. So I can look like them? Are you kidding me? Um, have you forgotten that I don’t look anything like them at all? I said, No. I’m against circumcision if you couldn’t tell. So is my foreskin. He tells me daily that he’s happy he’s stuck around this long. We shake hands often.

What's wrong with kids these days?

As the new school year begins, and I've already noticed which kids are "gifted" in their own unique way, I ask myself "What is wrong with these kids?" I had a student once who yelled back a lot and seemed to be angry. I asked for a parent conference with the principal. The parent came in and immediately began yelling and accusing us of singling out the son because he was different. The apple rarely falls far from the tree. I once thought that kids were getting dumber with each passing year. I was a the person playing "Operation" and the the information I tried to pull from my patients were stuck and their noses were buzzing with an angry pissed off air of "what's this going to do for me." I don't remember having this "what will I get out of this" attitude when I was in school. I remember thinking, if I don't do this, I'll get killed. If I do it, then everyone is happy, and I get to go away to college. Go away to college. GO AWAY! I try to explain that to my students, but they don't want to go away. Why? Most of them live in large plush houses with plasma screen televisions and maids that make them whatever they want. Most have fancy cars, pretty friends, and partying weekends. This is already college for them. In fact, one student has his own "house." He lives in the "guest" quarters of their estate, where he has his own kitchen, living room, and two bedroom area, and of course a garage for his car, and a pool. Why should he leave for college when his parents are rarely home, don't even know what he's doing, and don't ever seem to care. They've never once come in for a conference, even though he had the lowest grade in my AP class. My AP CLASS! S0 it thought that the kids these days are spoiled, just don't know what the real world is like. But then I thought, maybe I'm the one who doesn't know what the real world is like. After all, my post against MTV may be that I just don't "get it." But if that's what I don't get, then I'm probably better off being ignorant. But then I thought about it this way. The following things are what my high school students have may think: 1. Disposable everything has always been available. One use, and throw it away. 2. The microwave cooks more meals than the oven. 3. Cell phones have always existed. 4. O.J. never played football, but was in movies. 5. The Berlin Wall never existed. 6. The Soviet Union never existed. 7. Dolphin-free tuna has always existed. 8. TV stations have never gone "off air" with the national anthem. 9. White Christmas lights have always been "in-style." 10. Reality shows have always been on television. 11. Madden has always been a video game, not a Super Bowl coach. 12. Mili Vanili never existed. 13. Starbucks has always existed. 14. WalMart has always existed. 15. Noriega has alwasy been jailed. 16. Trickle-down is something they think of as a sexual act. 17. There has never been a "sky hook" shot in the NBA. 18. There has always been the "3-point" line. 19. They've probably never had to use a stamp. 20. Sex on television has always existed. Okay, so those are just a few. I invite you to add your own in the comments.

Ernesto Gives Florida a Tap on the Wrist

Ernesto came through Florida like a 2 year old throwing a mild tantrum against going to sleep. A couple of gusts of wind, a couple of rain showers, and poof. Off he went into the north leaving behind a few puddles, a few blown off palm fronds, and some annoyed and relieved Floridians. With all the preparations, you'd think this was the second coming of the real Ernesto (pictured left) with an army of rebel warriors looking to overthrow the government. How I'd actually like that. Instead, I got two days off of teaching, got to stay home and watch people scramble to pick up last minute supplies, wait in hour long lines for fuel, and complain about nearly everything. But, in the end, we're better off without this storm. I don't really think people in Florida were prepared to deal with another hurricane. It was a year ago yesterday that Katrina hit New Orleans, and it was that same storm that hit South Florida as a powerful tropical storm / minimal hurricane. So we can remember what it was like, and we didn't want to be reminded of how poorly prepared many people were in South Florida. What I would hate to see happen is that people will now underreact when the next storm comes. I'm afraid this weak system will be seen as a triumph by the Bush administration who will claim that this so-far-quiet tropical season proves that global warming is not as threatening as "real" scientists claim it to be. Thank god global warming doesn't exist: Minneapolis - 100 Bismark, N.D. - 112 (8 straight days of 100+) Oklahoma City - 15 straight days over 100 New York - 101 Baltimore - 102 Brain of Bush - n/a (no brain registered)

Heart Strings, not red strings

Her children's children give gifts of grand times Choosing love - Two little adopted ones keep the cup full for a Lake Oswego grandmother Thursday, August 24, 2006 ANNE TAYLOR "Grand" is a special word that describes some of life's most treasured events, and one of the most special of these events is the arrival of a grandchild. My first batch of "grands" was pure joy. Joey was the first, and he was the only one to know his Grandpa George. Sissy and Aaron were born soon after George died, and I have always felt that they were God's answer to the empty space his death left in my heart. Next came my wonderful Jake. I often think of the times I took them outside to say goodnight to the moon, asked about what was going on in their lives or just held them close and prayed that life would treat them kindly. But all too soon, they grow up and grow away, and the ties are loosening. Aaron is in Tacoma, Sissy and Joe away at college, and Jake is starting his senior year in high school. But life has a way of providing surprises, and in my old age, I have been provided with two more grandsons! Though life was successful and rewarding, Matt -- son No. 3 -- and his wife, Cornelia, felt that something important was missing. In this void Holt International held out a helping hand, and they filed an application for adoption of a Korean baby. After extensive investigation by Holt, the application was approved, and a baby boy was assigned to them. On April 29, 2002, Cornelia left for Korea to bring their 6-month-old baby home. They were met at the airport May 4, 2002, by a very excited new father, a history buff who named the baby Thomas Jackson Taylor. Jackson is a name Matt had always liked since he read about Stonewall Jackson of Civil War fame. Two years later, adoption proceedings were completed again, and another baby boy arrived at the airport. Michael John Taylor, now 2 years old, was named for Cornelia's father and brother. Mikey completes the family circle, adores big brother Tommy and tries to do everything Tommy does. Tommy scorns the idea of storks bringing babies. He says you just go to the airport, and someone brings you a baby! Tommy has trouble understanding why I live alone, so one day when I visited, he met me at the door with his favorite toy, a spaceman named Buzz Lightyear, which he gave me to live with so that I would not be lonely. He recently told Matt that he should give his mother hugs. This concept of giving in a 4-year-old tugs at the heartstrings. Where else but America could an 82-year-old grandma have 2- and 4-year-old grandkids? Ain't life grand? Anne Taylor lives in Lake Oswego.

Asians in the media

Okay, several posts in a short period, but oh well. This one I just thought was interesting. I use Yahoo! as my homepage, just because it's there. But lately, they've been running articles on colleges. A few weeks ago, they had an article about taking laptops to college, and there was an Asian girl posing at her desk with her spanking new laptop. I clicked on the image to read the article, but no other image came up, and the article wasn't really that exciting. Today, they're posting another article abot college: dorm prices. With all the people they could choose, they have two Asian girls standing in their dorm room. Again, click on the pic, and an article comes up, but on other pictures. Is this Yahoo! trying to appeal to an Asian audience? Or are they using this as a "model minority" subliminal message? Is this multiculturalism (if it was wouldn't they choose different models together?)? Or is this just coincidence? Sure Asians seem to go to college at a fairly high rate, but that doesn't mean that everyone in college is Asian. Just a thought. What do you think?

TRA better than TRL

You see, I don't even know what that means, but for some reason, the headline appeals to me. I guess that's what I get for having a stupid "writer's" sensibility. And, if you really think about the history of most writers and what they actually do in life (besides writing), you'd pretty much bet the horse on the fact that they don't always got sense. So anyway, I was thinking about the recent discussions about the ban on international adoption from Korea that has appeared on many of my fellow KAD blogs. While I don't want to go into the same territory I wanted to congratulate Twice the Rice, This Should Go Somewhere, and Harlow's Monkey for really pinning down what I feel on this situation. Being a dude (yes I use this word since I lived in Cali...and "ya'll" since I've lived in Texas) I often find myself coming to term with these things at a later stage in life, or slower, than female KADs (why does that term sound derogatory?). I know that women use more words to express themselves than men, and that women mature faster than men, and that men have two brains (joking...seriously, I am joking...we only have half a brain), and therefore I should expect these women to get to the point quicker than me. But, damn to hell, I am sure gonna put my two cents (due to inflation I shall actually be putting in $75.00) to this joy-machine video game. I agree with all three of my fellow lady friends, if I may be so bold to call them (although I've never actually met these ladies in real life, maybe Harlow's Monkey and I didn't know it a long time ago), that this "discussion" is important and yet polarizing. As Harlow's Monkey so aptly suggested, this seems to pit Adoptees against Adoptees. Look, we ain't your biatches! You can't use us to justify your position. Wait, stop the press. I just did thatvery thing, didn't I? Crap, revise, revise. Um...hold on, I'm thinking here. I'm a bit verklempt....give me a minute. I'll give you a topic....NON-Profit organizations...love em or hate em? Discuss: Look, a lot of people are blaming CHSFS (which is harder to say than just saying the real words...it's almost like a tongue twister). I don't blame em, they're just, um, looking out for the best interest of adoptees and potential abandonded children. Yeah. Actually, the only thing that I find weird is how people are saying that CHSFS is a non-profit organization and gives money to the countries and blah blah blah blah. Okay, so if you actually read the literature CHSFS puts out, they seem like decent folk. But so does HOLT, until you actually have first hand experiences with them. I've met many a HOLT KAD who ain't happy...oh, you want to see an angry adoptee? Stand outside of HOLT when a KAD is denied access to their records, or told, "oh, those records were lost in our building fire." CHSFS claims they spent a lot of money in Korea, and also in Vietnam, and other places. For example, even though Vietnam closed it's doors to international adoption from 2003 - 2005, CHSFS still spent money there to help establish sponsoring programs, "in-country" adoptions, and funding their child care services. This allowed them to stay in the country and establish good relations with the government. Hurray. But, the bottom line is this. The primary intent of this was to keep on the government's good side so that they'd already be there once Vietnam opened the doors to international adoption again. Despite their efforts to try to encourage "in-country" adoptions so the children could grow up in their native culture and homes, CHSFS turns right around and says, "Our Vietnam adoption program resumed in 2006, and happily we're bringing children home again!" Happy Happy Joy Joy! For those who think non-profits are only out for good, think again. A non-profit doesn't operate to generate profit, but if they do, it's not against the law. In fact, by law, they are allowed to trade (services) both legally and ethically for profit. If I understand business law correctly (I'm a fricking English teacher), a non-profit may establish itself first by being classified as a "corporation" and also as a non-profit organization. This allows the entity to be recognized as an individual under the current laws, which gives the organization all the rights that a human being would. This in itself is a bit creepy. A corporate human making profit on the placement of other humans in the homes of even other humans! Sounds like a made-for-TV sci fi flick. The letter is awkward, alarmist, and at times insulting. The letter is probably genuine in its appeal, but as KADs, we have a different perspective on this, and I don't like having people polarize our community with the good cop/bad cop routine. Don't categorize, as one of my fellow KADs said. I don't know, but this letter doesn't bother me as much as the comments some people are leaving on my fellow KAD's blogs. So please ya'll, chill out and stop trolling. If you don't like it, you don't always have to comment. If you think you're right, don't keep insisting that you are, cause then you'll look like an idiot. And idiots aren't taken seriously, unless you're George Bush.

Fresh Off the Boat

There's nothing better than eating sushi (not vegan, Didi, sorry!) that's fresh. If you end up in Daecheon or even Pusan, you should hit the fish market. The way this operates is quite simple. You go to the port, park, and walk around. You can watch the fish that have been freshly caught come right off the boat. You then follow the fish to the ajumma that will sell you the fish fresh from their saltwater baskets. From here, the "runner" takes this bag o' fish to the local sushi place of your choice, where the ajumma of the house will prepare the fish any way you want. Once you finish your meal, you can walk along the pier where locals cook and dry fish at their table-top charcoal cookers. This is a good way to ensure fresh fish, and watch hard working people at the same time. Also, you get to smell like the salt of the earth, or rather, sea.

For That Deep Down Body Noraebang

Thanks to Ji in, who posted this on her website, and I had to go visit and see for myself what she was talking about. Lo and behold, the ads just wrote themselves. The Biggest Noraebang Pennies Can Buy Get in My Noraebang A Noraebang A Day Helps You Work, Rest and Play (How ridiculously fitting is this?) Make it a Noraebang Night I'm Not Going to Pay a Lot for This Noraebang It's Not TV. It's Noraebang. Make Every Noraebang Count Welcome to Noraebang Country I could probably spend days on this site. Almost as much as I could spend on this one which gave me: LNO - Local Noraebang Operations And this website which gave me the following: noraebang - n. homework without beer This is weird. I'm getting freaked out.

Daily Adoption Article

Catholic family on road trip to promote adoption US Doctor to adopt Chiayi girl Adoption and health problems Just one fun one for levity

JOURNAL ENTRY

I was not a gift. I didn’t arrive like a package with neatly folded corners and invisible tape tucked inside each crease. I arrived in the arms of the escort, whom I didn’t know, with whom I had just met hours before. The plane, my second birth, released me from the trapped air inside, with the whisper of wind that smelled sweetly of smog. I was not a gift given willingly. I wasn’t wrapped in bright paper with love. I was wrapped in reluctance and shame. My mother and father and brother opened me carefully, not to tear the delicate fabric of my past, and washed me before use. I was accepted with two hands, but given with one. The other hand had no say, and I can only imagine the slight tug as she let my hand slip from her fingers. I returned to that foreign land that danced in dreams of my youth, with wrapped gifts of creams for the body which suffered, endured and grew. These salves served as a reminder of the touch we missed, of the ties we severed, and of our lives evaporated by time. I carried these gifts in my arms, as I was carried away, back to my birth land, to unburden them on my birth family. My suitcase stared back at me, with mouth agape in horror at the ease with which its bowels were emptied. It hungered, and soon was filled again with the gifts I was to bring back, to pour into my house the shadow of what could have been.

Koreans Rule Golf!

Kim becomes youngest U.S. Women's Amateur champion By ANNE M. PETERSON, AP Sports Writer August 13, 2006 NORTH PLAINS, Ore. (AP) -- When Kimberly Kim fell behind after the first 18 holes of the U.S. Women's Amateur, her caddie suggested she play "smashmouth" golf. The 14-year-old player from Hawaii took the advice and beat former bank clerk Katharina Schallenberg of Germany 1-up in 36 holes of match play Sunday to become the event's youngest champion. Schallenberg, 26, made a birdie putt from off the green on the par-5 36th hole. That placed the pressure on Kim to birdie for the victory at Pumpkin Ridge Golf Club. She sunk the putt from 5 feet out. "I was shaking so much," she said. "I don't even know where I aimed, or anything." After the morning session, Schallenberg was 2-up. Kim's caddie, Frank Nau, said: "We're going to play smashmouth golf." "I said, `What's that?' He said, `Just go for it," Kim said. Schallenberg cried after failing to become the first German-born player to win a USGA event. "I lost but it was OK because we both played good golf," she said. The championship match, on the 6,380-yard, par-71 Witch Hollow Course, featured very different players: Kim is a carefree teenager who didn't know going in that the Amateur was a "big" tournament, while Schallenberg is consistent and steady. Schallenberg got off to a fast start, going as much as 5-up on the opening 18 holes. But she lost steam and lost the last three holes of the morning. Kim was loose, with words of inspiration -- including "Trust" -- written in magic marker on her wrist. She and her caddie would often sit on the fairway while waiting for her shot, taking a break from temperatures in the low 90s. In the afternoon, Schallenberg struggled with three straight shots into bunkers on the par-5 No. 25 hole, Kim took over with a birdie putt on the par-4 No. 26 that tied the match. "I hadn't heard 'all square' in 20 some holes," Kim marveled. Kim went 2-up on the 31st hole with a par putt, and held on for the lead. Schallenberg briefly played at the University of Oregon in 2000 but quit because she had a fear of flying. She returned to Germany, where she apprenticed to be a bank clerk but found it "too boring," and is now studying international business. She won the 2005 and 2006 International German Amateur Championships, but has played infrequently in the United States. Kim, who has a mouthful of braces and says her hobby is sleeping, has been living recently in Arizona to be able to participate in more tournaments. Kim lost in the Women's Amateur Public Links final to Tiffany Joh, 6 and 5, earlier this year. She was the youngest player to make the cut at the U.S. Women's Open. She said it was the first time she had won an event in two years. "Usually when I get down I get really upset with myself and just give up," she said. Kim defeated 15-year-old Lindy Duncan of Plantation, Fla., 1-up in Saturday's semifinals to make it to the finals, while Schallenberg downed 21-year old Texan Stacy Lewis on the 19th hole. "I wasn't expecting to win the U.S. Open, just make the cut. Today, I was shaking," Kim said. Kim didn't realize the weight of the run she was making at the Amateur until she saw a commercial for the event on television. A former Amateur champion then showed her Cox Cup. "I didn't know it was that big of a tournament until last night, when there was a commercial on the Golf Channel, and I thought, `Wow, this is a big deal,"' she said. "I don't even watch golf, I was just looking for myself." Earlier in the week, Paige Mackenzie was the medalist in stroke-play qualifying. Before Kim, the youngest Amateur champion was Laura Baugh, who won it in 1971 at 16 years, two months and 21 days. Last year's Amateur was won by 17-year-old Morgan Pressel at the Ansley Golf Club's Settindown Creek course in Roswell, Ga. Pumpkin Ridge Golf Club was the site of the U.S. Women's Open in 1997 and 2003. Tiger Woods won the 1996 U.S. Amateur at the club.

Students allowed to specify race

This is posted on the NY Times, but I know some of you probably don't have the silly registered status, so I decided it was important enough news to post here in full text. New York Times August 9, 2006 Proposal Adds Options for Students to Specify Race By ELISSA GOOTMAN For years, some mixed-heritage students have rebelled against schools’ and colleges’ efforts to get them to identify themselves as one race or another. Now the federal Education Department has proposed new regulations that would let students circle as many categories as they want. In releasing its proposal, the department is complying with guidelines set forth nine years ago by the Office of Management and Budget that mandated that people be allowed to mark more than one race on federally required forms. As immigration and intermarriage are redefining race across the country, a growing number of people who cannot easily place themselves in one category have become increasingly frustrated with having to do so. The 2000 census allowed people to circle multiple racial categories; 2.4 percent did so. With its proposal, the Education Department is also seeking to capture that population. But the move raises intriguing questions on how educational progress among different racial groups will be monitored, and how the new categories may skew long-term studies of the racial achievement gap. “We basically have a continuous way of defining these categories that’s gone on for close to 40 years, and this is going to be a big change,” said Gary Orfield, the director of the Civil Rights Project at Harvard, who said the proposal would harm the ability of researchers and civil rights groups to track race on campus. Under existing regulations, schools and colleges must report to the government how many of their students fall into each of five categories: black, white, Hispanic, Asian/Pacific Islander and Native American/Alaska Native. Under the proposed regulations, which were issued Monday and first reported by the Web publication Inside Higher Ed, there would be two questions. The first would ask whether a student is Hispanic. The second would ask students to select one or more descriptions from the following groups: American Indian or Alaska Native, Asian, black, Native Hawaiian or other Pacific Islander, and white. But students who identify themselves as Hispanic would be counted only as Hispanics, even if they also check off other categories. If non-Hispanic students check off more than one racial category in response to the second question, they will be listed under “two or more races,” but those races will not be specified. The new reporting system would not directly affect the way kindergarten through 12th-grade schools are required to break down achievement data by race and ethnicity under the No Child Left Behind law, which sanctions schools that fail to bring all groups to proficiency. The rules are now subject to a 45-day comment period and, if approved by the department, will go into effect in 2009. Patrick J. Sherrill of the Office of Planning, Evaluation and Policy Development at the Education Department said the proposal balanced the need for information on schools’ racial makeup with the desire not to saddle schools and colleges with overly burdensome reporting. “We have a growing population of people that want to be identified other than is currently possible, and to meet the needs of this group we’re going to have to make a change,” Mr. Sherrill said. “Some people would like to have it broken down into every cell. They’d like to have a matrix of every race by every race. But you’d end up breaking it down into such small groups that you can’t for our purposes plot any trends.” Mr. Orfield of Harvard, however, said the new system would most likely lead to an undercount of blacks, American Indians, Asians and Pacific Islanders, and would “tend to produce a maximum number of Latino students.” “There’s a huge difference between a Japanese person who marries a Hawaiian and a black person who marries a Latino,” he said. “Those categories are related to totally different destinies in our society, and they’ll all be lumped into this box.” Alfredo Padilla, education manager at the Mavin Foundation, a Seattle group that deals with issues affecting people of mixed heritage, said that while he was pleased that the proposed regulations would no longer force multiracial students to choose one category, they raised new problems. “It provides them with visibility of students’ mixed heritage,” he said of the Education Department, “but it renders their specific heritage invisible.”

Adoption News

San Francisco Catholic Charities announced Aug. 2 that it would no longer be involved in the child adoption activities of home studies, family and child matching, adoptive placements or finalizations, the last formal step of the adoption process. Read full article here. Born in Bangkok... and brought up in Burnside. Read article here. This one is about a girl who was living with a family who loved her, until the gov't stepped in and decided to take her away from them (after they wanted to keep her as their own) and gave her to another family in Scotland. And another article, this one on the ASIA camp a friend of mine actually helps run. Henry Wylie loves all things Korean. From perfecting kimchi recipes to learning ancient folk tales, the 10-year-old absorbs each cultural tidbit like a sponge. The love of his native culture has been encouraged by his adoptive parents, Mary Anne and Gill Wylie of Baltimore, who each summer send Henry and his brother, Gill, to an international culture camp where they join other adoptees in activities geared to foster appreciation for the adopted children's native cultures. Read full article here.

No Family History

This is what Appa gets to look over day and night As a child, I arrived with shots and scars. My medical history was given by the agency, not by my birth family. For whatever reason, this information of blood and genes were not slipped into the manila folder of my past. But, in America even the shots seemed to fade. My mother would accompany me to the doctor, folder in hand, slim with one sheet of paper. Here was my medical history. The questions would be asked, I would not pay attention. Shots would be given. My arms would ache, my fatty tissue bruise, and finally, I’d forget until the following year. As I grew older, the doctors I’d see would stare blankly at me as I explained, “I’m adopted.” Instead of writing “adopted” in their notes, they’d crib “No Family History.” This was who I became. No genetic link. DNA double-helix to no one. I’d think back, maybe I’m forgetting something. Still life: my blonde haired brother skating down the street. Photograph: my red-haired mother cooking dinner and sipping tea. “This is all I have,” I’d say and hand them my single sheet of paper. Dates and shots lined up like marks on a ruler that measured my life by pricks and pains. You only fathom your morality when the people you love begin to die. Grandparents passed quickly in some cosmic line of order. Then, as I began to see my brother’s face shift into my father’s and grandfather’s, I looked for my place. There was nothing there to find, except the knowledge that my brother and father will someday die old and wrinkled and ashen gray tossed into fertile ground. Where was the grass with which I could hold communion? Which blade speaks to me? It is over the sea, in a hill overlooking a lake, marked by granite stone and unkempt grass. It is in the National Memorial, overlooking Seoul, the city that called me to its heart when I finally poured myself into the child that will carry my genes. my ancestral burial mounds No longer must I stare at the white lab coat writing “No Family History.” I can say with pride, “my blood is ancient, and flows further than yours.”

Terms people use to find me again

Asians Have Small Penises - This person from Australia was using a Korean typepad, so I'm imagining they were wondering if it was true themself. Race Joke for Korean - I'm only hoping that this New Jerseyian from Stevens Institute of Technology wasn't hoping to find one to offer up to their Korean friend at work. Whatever it was, they didn't stay long, less than 1 second. Black Booty - This person from Riyad, Saudi Arabia was using an English program, and so I have a weird feeling this was an American military officer. I could be wrong, just "color" me suspect. But alas, my webpage wasn't what they were looking for, as they only looked for less than a second. No pics, sorry boys. RECENT - Someone just searched "RACIST NORTH KOREAN JOKES". Said person from Melbourn Cambridgeshire UK didn't find what they were looking for. GOOD!

Masochist Television

You have to be one to watch this channel anymore. Every single thing about the shows, the content, and even the music, makes me scream with the same pain I'd feel if someone were pulling out my eyelashes one by one. To think that this is the very station I turned to as a youth in order to feed my sense of morals and patriotism in being anti-American. But, somewhere along the line, being anti-American was mainstreamed as being American, and therefore the irony no longer works for MTV. They think they're smart, but they're the kind of smart that hurts. What used to work for this station was their subversive content. But, what subversive content they think they have can't truly be subversive now that teenagers co-opt these messages as their calling card to being hip and mod. You can't be subversive sitting in a glorious Times Square office sipping Starbucks and listening to Timbaland's new pathetic pleonastic sexy song. This can't be subversive when your top rated show is a glossy not-so-reality reality show called Laguna Beach, where rich kids listen to the very songs played on MTV (whenever that is) while driving Range Rovers and sitting in their privileged parents' palace overlooking the Pacific. This is the station that once gave us Beavis and Butthead, Ren and Stimpy, and Daria! For God sake, what happend to Daria's self-reflective wit and sarcasm about the very channel she was promoting? Oh, that's right. MTV bought her out and now she sits there trying to be funny in her cartoonish self, wearing the same exact outfit, the same hair, the same glasses, complaining about the same MTV, which no longer exists. I was willing to give MTV a chance at feeding my summer stupor, but I got turned off by the very shows MTV promotes as being able to turn you on. Instead, these are cheesy scripted shows that get you to date a mom in Date My Mom (ageism, weirdly incestual, and pubescent fantasy promotion), date someone who is already taken at the request of the person's parents in Parental Control (cheating and promiscuity promotion), to date someone with the promise of cash NEXT (prostitution and speed dating promotion), or to date someone who will look and act like someone else in My Own (I don't know what this promotes besides stupor in my brain). I was willing to believe these shows were for real, and I was sorry that these people would even put themselves on these shows as human beings in our society. But, the dreadful dialogue, the cheap cliches, and the abominable acting intimated that these shows weren't real. But what tipped me off was something I wasn't expecting. The actors themselves. I don't watch these shows with any frequency, so actually catching one on during the summer months is chance, and so if I caught this, I can only image the situation is worse. Here it is: Parental Control - particular episode in question features a guy named 20 something "X" who is dating "Y." Y's parents don't like X and set up two blind dates for their daughter to "replace" X. Y goes on both dates and decides that Date B is the man for her, and boots X to the curb. X leaves in a huff and curses out the TV crew and parents. NEXT - particular episode in question features a young blond girl who has a hankering for role-playing in weird medieval fashion. Why this is, I don't know, but she has the boys dress up in Robin Hood style stuff and do strange things throughout the show. What catches my attention is that boy "X" from Parental Control is one of the potential suitors, but this time he says he is 18. Hmmm...goes by the same name, different age, and then gets dissed by this girl. Ouch, that's got to hurt. You got dissed twice on national television. NEXT - same day, next episode. A guy is looking for his "perfect booty" girl who can dance. One contestant, a young black girl with what she calls her "thang", says she's sure to win. NOPE. My Own - a young Asian guy wants his own version of "Fergie." I don't know what people's obsession with her is, but I find her kind of like a clown (scared Ji-in?) who couldn't figure out if she was a happy-faced or sad-faced clown. Either way, this young Asian hipster has brought along his two Asian brahs to help him pick out the girl who can be just like Fergie. Onto the stage of hopeful contestants arrives the girl from NEXT with the same exact jeans and the same exact "thang" statement. Oh no, I've seen this car wreck before. Can I watch, officer? Needless to say, she loses again, and thus goes down into national television hall of shame with contestant X from above as being dissed twice on the same channel. These "actors" or reality stars gave away MTV's secret. They can't even find "real" people to do their reality shows. This saddens me to discover that teenagers are actually buying into this concept of reality, and are mimicking this reality in their own lives. In a day when FOX News has a larger viewership than even turned out for the 2004 presidential elections, when CNN and ESPN look virtually the same, when movies all play the same theme over, and music and fashion are recycled events of my past, I shouldn't be surprised at MTV. But, I still hold out hope. Without hope, we have nothing. And if we have nothing, MTV will be sure to create a reality show about it.

Dino Wino with Noah and Wipo!

I was browsing (remember folks, to peruse means - go through with a fine toothed comb) some websites, and reading Pandagon and somehow came across this website. I loved dinos as a little kid, and I also love them now. I think they're cool. But I had no idea that God made them, nor that they hung out with Noah on the Ark! Oh, and see the 20 minute video for FREE!

Article my mom sent me

That's right, my mom told me about this article because she knew I'd probably be interested. This is after I gave her Cheri Register's Beyond Good Intentions to read. Search for birth mother has Hollywood ending By Emily Bazar, USA TODAY Posted 7/27/2006 9:16 PM ET WASHINGTON — When crushing chest pains knocked Air Force Col. Bruce Hollywood to his knees, his first thought was that if he were dying, he wanted to say goodbye to his family. As he wrote a farewell letter at his desk at the Pentagon, the highlights of his life flashed through his mind. His adoptive mother's advice rang in his ears: "You should find your Japanese mother," she often told him before she died. After Hollywood, 46, survived the May 2005 scare — doctors opened a clogged artery with a stent — he decided it was time to take that advice. And when Japan's ambassador to the United States took an interest, quick action brought mother and son together. On Thursday, Hollywood and his birth mother celebrated their recent reunion at lunch with the people who helped bring them together, including Ambassador Ryozo Kato. "Col. Hollywood has found his real mother," Kato said. "Together with other relatives, it's a significant addition to the already fruitful life he's been enjoying." According to Hollywood and his mother, Nobue Ouchi, who was interviewed through an interpreter, their story is about a dream fulfilled and a rich life made richer. Ouchi, 65, met Hollywood's biological father — also in the U.S. Air Force — in Shizuoka, Japan. When he left the country, Ouchi says, she didn't realize she was pregnant. Concerned that a mixed-race child would face prejudice in Japan, Ouchi allowed an Air Force couple in Japan at the time to adopt her son when he was about 2 months old. A year later, the new family moved back to the USA. Hollywood, of Stafford, Va., says he has lived a "fairy tale" life. He played high school football and was president of the student body, married and has two children. He does strategic planning for the Defense Department. Even though his adoptive mother often urged him to find his biological mother, he didn't feel the need until that day that he thought he was dying. At that moment, he wanted to thank her for making his good life possible. Ouchi, though, says she always knew she and her son would be reunited someday. She has cherished a letter and picture that Hollywood's adoptive mother sent to her several months after the adoption. Ouchi, who never married or had other children, opened a restaurant and named it after her son. "I thought about him every day," she says. To find her, Hollywood contacted a friend who knew the director of the Japanese studies center at Vanderbilt University in Nashville, and the information from Hollywood's Japanese passport was forwarded to the Japanese Embassy in March. In two weeks, the embassy had located his mother. Mother and son met for the first time when Hollywood traveled to Japan in April. This week, Ouchi is visiting him. Her dream came true. His heart grew fuller. "At that moment when I looked back at my life, I really thought that in the game of life, I won," Hollywood says. "This whole new world opened up to me, and it's like I get to play a bonus round."

Adoption Answers 101

This post will ramble, but have some important things I’ve been thinking about for the last week or so. Please read with an open mind. I think this may upset fellow KAD bloggers, other adoptees, APs, and even the random reader. INTRODUCTION With the advent of the internet adoption resources have blossomed, making it easier for potential adoptive parents and current adoptive parents to find information on raising a transracial adoptee. This wealth of information often overloads the parent and the adoptee with evidence that there is no right way. While this may not be comforting to the parent, who is often looking for the answer, this can be doubling disconcerting for the adoptee, who may be looking for clues to their late-life identity crisis. LIFE FACILITATOR While I don’t think I’ve had a mid-life identity crisis (my wife seems to disagree), I do find myself exploring the issue of adoption, race, and transracial / multiracial identity nearly everyday. Is this a burden? I’ve actually found this experience enlightening. And it’s made me a better reader, a more intense reader, and more curious about issues that wouldn’t normally hold my interest. I find myself reading books and articles on mothering, feminism, cultural anthropology, crime, forensics, germs, psychology, and of course, race. This sudden pique of interest has allowed me to rediscover the joy I had in reading and thinking. As a teacher, I often find myself bored with reading, especially since I must engage with teenagers who have wasting grey matter translated into wasted white paper. I read student papers with the same interest that I watch FOX news. I’m waiting for something to actually make sense. So do I make sense? And are parents lurking in the shadows of these blogs to find an answer? Perhaps, but do I hate that? No. Again, this comes down to my sense as a teacher. Okay, I hate that job title anyway. As a teacher, I’m expected to have the answers. But I don’t always have the answers, and I tell my students that. They think I’m insane when I say things like, “I don’t know that. Why don’t you look it up?” or “What do you think the right answer would be?” This isn’t laziness on my behalf. It’s part of my way of getting the kids engaged in learning. I don’t want to be seen as the source, I want to be seen as a facilitator. If I can get them to discover it on their own, they learn two things: the information they wanted, and that they can be self-reliant. Self-reliance is important to strip away the indoctrination that happens in a school setting. Teacher stands in front of class and lectures and gives answers. Students learn that teacher (older personage) is always right. I hate this concept. The teacher is almost never right. The teacher shouldn’t always be right because that wouldn’t be human. To err is human. Whoever said that (I do know, I’m just being obtuse), was right. And that in itself is ironic, isn’t it? PARENTING THE TRANSRACIAL ADOPTEE We all make mistakes. Parents of all types make mistakes. But in the end, I think a majority of parents would say, “We did a pretty good job.” I’d agree. I think the majority of parents will do a good job of raising their child. And that’s just it. These are children, who are often not ready to deal with racial identity. But, this isn’t an excuse for APs to say, “P2H told us we don’t have to do that.” On the contrary, you have to live it because your child can’t really “learn” it. They can only develop it through life experiences. The early development of racial identity is important in identifying the “self” later on in life. If the child isn’t exposed to people who look similar, then the experience of encountering others of the same race later in life can be troubling and uncomfortable. This is called imprinting. Science has already shown the importance of imprinting on young children immediately after birth, and even immediately after adoption. This bonding is integral to making the child feel loved and comfortable in his or her new setting. Sometimes parents think that they’ll raise their kids in the best way by living in a grand house, living in the best neighborhood, and sending their child to the best school. However, this is really done in an American-European-White sensibility, since in large part, the best schools and neighborhoods are predominantly white in America. So this will mean the school will be predominantly white, the children will be predominantly white, and the culture will be predominantly white American. I don’t think this is the ideal situation for the child. Remember, children need to develop a sense of racial identity at a young age, and so the child may have difficulty later in life trying to re-learn their sense of self once they’re exposed to other cultures. They may have feelings of guilt, disassociation, anger, resentment, and even violence. The now famous study of transracial adoptees done in the early 90s in Sweden clearly shows how psychological and social problems are inordinately higher in transracial adoptees than in native Swedes. Is Sweden any different than America? Yes, clearly the two are culturally different, but take into account that a large percentage of KADs were taken to Minnesota, where nearly 90% of all people were white (2004 census), and only 3.4% were identified as Asian. Sweden’s last census showed that 90% of the country was “white,” and 10% were non-white foreigners. Thus, I think it’s important for transracially adopted children to be exposed early and often to people of similar racial backgrounds. While this may mean the family must make a sacrifice, I find this a small request considering it is for the best of the child. BLOGGING At the same time, I think it is also the responsibility of adult adoptees to keep the communication lines open, no matter how often they are verbally abused, beaten, or denigrated. This is easier said than done. As a male, I enjoy a ridiculously arbitrarily higher status than females. People tend to listen to men as authorities rather than women. Why this is probably has to do with our own identity imprints early on in life. But I find that the majority of KAD bloggers and other transracial adoptees are women, who are often taken lightly, as ungrateful, or as just “angry” and “bitter.” I also am new to this blogging experience and therefore have had little in the way of hate mail, hate blogging, or personal attacks. I don’t blame many of my fellow KADs and other transracial adoptees for password protecting their blog posts. However, at the same time, I wonder if this is counter productive. Some of these posts are surely to set people off. I’m sure this blog post will set some people off. But this is part of the experience that we share with the world of KADs and transracial adoptees. If we continue to self-segregate our thoughts for only ourselves, perhaps we are merely perpetuating the very thing we’re trying to fight against: Ignorance. I only think this is my perspective as a teacher. I try to use every day as an opportunity to educate. I take criticism as a learning experience, and try to turn it into a learning experience for the person who has criticized. Will this often fall on deaf ears? Of course. There are those who don’t want to listen, or to learn, or to admit they may be wrong. This is the price we pay. This is our burden. This is our responsibility. Besides, I don’t want to do it alone. Sometimes, when I’m teaching I think that nobody cares. Last year I moved to Florida after spending 5 years at a private school in MD. Several months ago, as the school year was ending, I received a letter in the mail from a student at the former school. I had never had this student in a class. But I had spoken to this student only once about my experience of growing up adopted and how I felt about my family and my place in life. The student wrote me a letter more than a year later saying that although he never had me as a teacher, he will always remember what I told him, and that he was forever changed in his attitude toward life and his family. Every once in a while we touch someone without knowing. It makes the other times of speaking to deaf ears worthwhile. MOTHERHOOD AND ADOPTION Also, I’ve been thinking about APs, and specifically adoptive mothers, who are most often the ones who express themselves on blogs. I think women are more inclined to express themselves because of the social gratification they receive. For example, men tend to speak less when they are upset or excited than women. Men tend to internalize, rather than express, and even though this is a generalization, it’s been scientifically supported in several studies. Therefore, women tend to reach out to others during stressful times, like adopting a child. In this reaching out, the prospective adoptive mothers reach out to other adoptive mothers to find out what their experiences will be like. It’s also a way to apply a salve to the stressful waiting period that all adoptive parents go through. However, this may have more genetic links than us adult adoptees are willing to give. It’s been discovered that during pregnancy different hormone levels rise in women, causing different types of emotional and physical changes. Of course, we also know that there are things such as phantom pregnancies, and also the weird, but true “sympathy” pregnancy that men feel. In all of these phenomena, people experience pain, anxiousness, and stress. One of the primary chemicals released in women during this time is oxytocin. This chemical is found in all humans, and is at its peak during orgasm. For those who’ve ever had an orgasm (Anyone? Anyone?) you often know that your brain doesn’t seem to function as well immediately after. You’re sort of in a daze. At least I am. Ask me a question, and it might take me a minute to understand what you’re asking. Two plus Two! What is a grilled portabella sandwich, Alex? Oxytocin in women is also at its peak just after giving birth. Scientists think this helps with the let down of milk, but also to make the woman more susceptible to bonding with the child. Now, if this is true, perhaps a lot of gah gah behavior for the adopted child after arriving (that many adult adoptees find discomforting), is caused by the spike in oxytocin levels in the mother, who is mimicking the bonding time of pregnant women, which is needed to help imprint upon the child a new family sense. Similarly a lot of social networking (see the explosion of mothering websites) is merely just that. A way to feel connected to something else outside your own body, when the physical part of your body is being taken up by another human being. Not only that, since pregnancy is seen as the ultimate role of womanhood by society, and also as a great bonding experience, those women who adopt for infertility reasons, or who have not known pregnancy, may be using these blogs as a way to bond with other mothers. Because there aren’t any physical manifestations of the “waiting period,” these prospective mothers may be creating milestones and other “trinkets” to express the “labor” they feel. While some may find this overboard, this is probably psychologically healthy for the mother to ensure proper bonding experiences once the child arrives. CONCLUSION Part of the experience of being a KAD and a transracial adoptee is growing up. That’s what I am doing, and that’s what the children adopted today will do ten, twenty, or even thirty years from now. Don’t be surprised when you find your adopted child questioning you, your motives, or your parenting. It’s part of growing up. It’s just that transracial adoptees have to do it twice. Once during our adolescent years when all children go through the separation phase, and again when we discover that something in us is truly different than the rest of the family. I don’t want to be perceived as that grateful child. I’m not ungrateful, nor am I grateful. I just exist. I’m merely one of thousands just voicing out every aspect that affects me. Don’t use me as your affirmation. I don’t know if this makes sense to anyone, but that’s what has been on my mind now for several weeks. Hopefully you read this whole post. (Show of hands!) If you did, give yourself a star and a pat on the back. If you didn’t, you wouldn’t know what to do since this is the end.

Adoption Articles

Found an interesting article. Adopting a world view By JODI SPIEGEL ARTHUR The Intelligencer Globe-trotting celebrities such as Angelina Jolie are shining a bright spotlight on international adoption, helping to increase awareness of a practice that hasn't received this much attention since children were airlifted to safety at the end of the Vietnam War. Many local parents who have adopted a child from another country said they had a number of reasons for doing so, including humanitarian ones. However, the biggest motivation for many was a fear that an American birth mother would decide against adoption. Continue reading here. The faces of international adoption ContraCostaTimes.com August 6th, 2006 Read article here. Bringing home a child just the beginning Medical problems that accompany newest family member often add to complexities of international adoptions ContraCostaTimes.com August 6th, 2006 Read article here. Yearning for family transcends borders ContraCostaTimes.com August 6th, 2006 Read article here. All of those articles from ContraCostaTimes.com are written by Jackie Burrell. Getting help with 'business of adoption' OrlandoSentinel.com August 3rd, 2006 Read article here.

Jesus was Korean

Christ the King of Korea. Hmmm....it doesn't look like King Sejong? This exhibit, "Madonnas of the Morning Calm: Sacred Images from Korea" is online here. The ones of the "Holy Mother and Child of Korea" seem most interesting. I didn't know that there was a Christ of Korea, nor did I know that there was a Mother of Virgins, Mother of Love.

How did you find me?

I do wonder sometimes how people find me. That's why I use sitetracker. Here are phrases people used to find me through both Google and Blogger search in the last few days: China adoption Taste palate Noraebang in Korea Cindy Cheung stereotype Final Fu Adoptees Asian Women Someone today searched my blog for "Asian Women" and then clicked on the picture of Miss Japan from the Miss Universe competition. If you went to Blogger search and typed in "Asian Women" you'll not be surprised to find that the majority are pornography websites. You have been warned.

Oh the humanity

I typed in "ladybug" in Yahoo! search images, and came up with some interesting items. It's almost impossible now for me NOT to find these things. However, this particular item just struck me as ironic. Let's call our adoptive child, "Daddy's Little Girl" when in fact, one of the primary reasons this child is here is because its birth father didn't want it. Right... This particular family-run business claims that: As proud parents of a daughter adopted from China, we are always looking for ways to incorporate Chinese culture into our everyday lives. I totally agree. This is what all APs should do in some way. Our desire to find unique items that celebrate Chinese culture began while we were still in the “paper chase” process of the adoption of our daughter. During that time, we looked for items to give to friends and family members as a way to introduce them to Chinese culture. In the years since we have become a “forever family,” we have continued to look for ways to share our love of China with others. We started this company with this goal in mind. Wait, but you're selling personalized embroidered gifts that you made in the USA. How is that going to introduce people, and specifically your child, to Chinese culture? Also, for all you APs. I think a lot of adoptees find the concept of "forever family" a bit offensive. This shirt comes from another store on Cafepress! The owner's own words: As an artist and adoptive mom to twin daughters from China, I know how hard it is to find quality designs and unique products that cater to adoptive & multicultural families. Thank goodness your artistic skills are finally paying off! DISCLAIMER: Let me clarify my stance on products on adoption. I don't necessarily object to APs buying things culturally related for their adoptive child. I think it can be a tangible piece of evidence of a former life for the child. However, I still think that these items should most likely be something brought with them from their "birth" country. Not manufactured, and then sold for profit, by APs. I don't mean a straw hat or a jade pendant, but something truly meaningful that all babies of that culture would normally get during their first few years of life. And I certainly don't mean diaper bags with my name written on it in hangul, with the words "Angels watch over me." Authentic items might be the type you have in Korea for a 100 day celebration, the 1 year celebration, and of course, the seasonal festivals. But not all Korean kids get their names written in hangul on a silver pendant to wear. In fact, most of the vendors who seem to do this in Seoul, are based in Itaewon (where all the tourists go to shop). While I think this can be a fun activity for adoptive kids when they go back on a tour of Korea, it isn't a typical Korean thing to do. But, then again, I'm not your typical Korean. And since I've never lived in Korea, what do I know? Perhaps there are millions of babies crawling around with stuff like that. I was contacted by Seoul Identity Jewelry who said that she was upset at some comments made about the intent of her company. I fully agree with her that as a browser we do not know what her intentions are, were, or will be. Her willingness to give some of the money to GOA'L or KAAN is unique, and praiseworthy. However, intent is almost never part of the equation in the reaction people have. Did Mel Gibson "intend" to offend? He claims he didn't, but the end result was that people were and are extremely upset. Was it a DJs intent to be racist on the air? I'm sure it wasn't his intent to offend Asians, but he did. Was it a MD gov't official's intent to be racist? No, he says, but his comments were taken as such. As a writer, I don't intend for a lot of things to happen once I publish a story, or put it out there for people to read. But once it's out there for public consumption, and consumption is exactly what a lot of APs who run businesses are about, it is out of the creator's hands, and becomes part of the public dialogue.

We're not in Korea anymore

(you can buy this hat, but not the guy, from a store called "Sillyjokes") It's interesting to land in San Francisco after having being in Seoul for any extended time. I couldn't tell if I had actually left Korea. There were Asians as far as the eye could see. We passed them on the road, in stores, and in the airport. Landing in Florida at 1am, I didn't except to be confronted with other Asians. I wasn't. Instead, I was confronted with a gaggle of teens chirping about how tired they were. They looked like a "missionary" group, and it was clear that they'd just returned from a mission to China. All the teens were white, and judging from the appearance of their parents who came to pick them up, and the brand name cars they drove away in, these teens were also from very wealthy families. They were all carrying or wearing various asundry cultural artifacts. Several boys wore the straw peasant rice-field hats and nearly all the girls were sporting colorful paper parasols with the typical floral prints against their white shoulders. Perhaps it was sunny. After all, this is south Florida. No, wait. That's right, it was 1 AM! Maybe they were partaking in the culture? No, they were just taking the culture. Probably what happened was they tried to leave their religious culture in China, those poor communists just don't know better, and in turn, were bringing home peasant hats as a souvenir of the great time they had spreading Christian cheer. This was "slumming" it in the worst possible way.

Why Male Drivers Hate Danica Patrick

Because she's cute, and a good driver, and embarasses the boys a lot. Also, it just goes against the stereotype most young males have that girls are bad drivers. I hear this all the time. However, I also hear mostly from boys that they got a ticket, got into an accident, or caused an accident. Hmmm...don't teenage male drivers also have higher insurance premiums? I don't know? Here's my feeling. I'm not a huge racing fan. Okay, actually, I've never even sat down to watch more than 30 seconds of an IRL or NASCAR race. It's primarily because these are corporations in hiding. They're not sports. Not in the traditional sense of mano y mano. Look, men are afraid of being beaten by a girl. Look at chess. There is still a resitance to female chess players, and even then, most are treated as novelty and only taken somewhat seriously if they're "cute." However, along comes a petite fiery driver named Danica Patrick and suddenly she's not good enough? Sure, she's never won an IRL race. But in the current IRL indy series, there are at least 6 other drivers who haven't won a single IRL race either. Is there talk that they just aren't "good enough" to compete? No. Every focus is on Danica Patrick and how SHE hasn't won. So I figured, well there must be something to this. She's gotta suck, right? Not so fast (no pun in intended). She's currently ranked 10th in the IRL standings. Top 10? That's pretty good. But not according to "race" experts. They say, "Well, there just aren't that many full time IRL drivers." So let's minimize it, why don't we? I mean, come on. Pick on someone your own size. Of course, for the experts, that would mean picking on a 300 pound middle-aged balding man. Okay, so after further investigation, look at the numbers: Danica Patrick - 10 starts, 6 top 10 finishes. Vitor Meira - 11 starts, 9 top 10 finishes. Marco Andretti - 11 starts, 6 top 10 finishes. Dario Franchitti - 11 starts, 5 top 10 finishes. Tomas Scheckter - 11 starts, 7 top 10 finishes. All these other male drivers are ranked in the top 10, too, and have no wins this year. Sure, they have career wins, but that's because most have been racing longer than Danica. Tomas Scheckter didn't win his first race until 3 years after he began. It took Dario Franchitti over 2 years to win his first race, and it took Dan Wheldon 2 years to win his first race and he's considered one of the best drivers in the world. Danica has been racing just over one year now. She's had 4 top 5 finishes, 13 top 10 finishes, and won 3 poles in only 27 starts. So let's stop with this "girl" identity and just let her drive. The only reason I can see for her NOT to go into the NASCAR after she had thought about it, was because she'd probably be treated worse there than in IRL. Heck, even one of her fellow IRL racers said, "I think Danica's pretty aggressive in our cars...when it's the right time of the month." That aside, I think she's made some interesting career choices. Like other successful female athletes before her (Kournikova and Sharapova), she's posed for "spreads" in magazines like FHM, which flaunt women as eye-candy for men's consumption. However, that shouldn't negate the fact that she has talent.

More Adoption Goodies to Buy

Adoption Yin-Yang tank top. Please note that it is "Made in the USA" Adoption Red thread mug Adoption Mousepad Check out the online "adoption goodies" store here. I didn't know the extent of this. What do you all think? I'm glad APs are excited about their adoptions, and I'm also well aware of the fact that it causes stress for APs. But, some of this stuff seems bizarre to me. Also, we should be thankful for Cafepress, where you can buy and make just about anything you want. Even racist, gross, and just immoral things (as seen below). Also, I saw one shirt that said, "Fuck Hezbollah." I don't know. You'd think a store wouldn't want themselves to be associated with things like that. But, hey, I guess a buck is worth suspending your morals and conscience. And again, note where it is made. Isn't that nice? Let's support ourselves even more!

History in the making

As a teacher, I've always wondered what the detriment of television viewing has done for the general public. I've seen students complain that they don't understand the written word, and it seems to get worse each year. Studies have shown that the more television children watch, the more likely they will later develop ADHD and other related problems. It has been linked with, although not conclusively, with decreased literacy skills. In addition, excessive television viewing has been linked with obesity and other health issues. Most of what you see is junk food for the brain. It's easy and simple to digest. There is no thought process involved. Even some of the best shows, both news and entertainment (although news is now entertainment), don't require "active" participation. Active learning is the type of "learning" needed to grow new brain cells. However, some of the most significant memories I have come from television. And these memories are vivid, thanks in part to the advent of live television and color television. For example, I remember staying up all hours to watch the 1988 Olympic games from Seoul. I remember watching Kirk Gibson hit the Game One pinch-hit home run in the 1988 World Series against the A's. I can vividly recall dancing in front of the television wearing my Red Wings jersey when my beloved Red Wings won the Stanley Cup back to back in 97 and 98. As you can see, these are all sports related, and I guess I watch a lot of sports (sorry, Didi). But, at the same time, as a SAHD during the summer, I realize that watching TV can be fun with kids. Dora the Explorer is great to watch with the Noodle, because she's learning Spanish, problem solving, and having fun. Plus, we both get involved in the show. She jumps up and dances, or goes and touches the TV screen to point which place they need to go, or which tool from Backpack Dora and Boots need to complete the task. Didi came home from work one day and told me how she felt embarassed that she didn't know what "Sesame Place" was. All the other parents were taking their kids there, and Didi couldn't understand why they'd take their kids to an Asian restaurant. I didn't know either, until I figured out they must've meant Sesame Street. But what's interesting is that this was when Noodle was real little, less than a year. They asked her if she'd want to bring Noodle, and she said, "No, Noodle doesn't know what Big Bird is. We don't let her watch TV." Their reaction: "Really? She doesn't watch TV? What do you do with her?" Okay, so that's partially a lie. We'd let her see snippets of stuff. But we weren't the type of parents to plop her down in front of the tube while we went off and did our own thing. I'd actively play with her, take her outside, nap with her, do whatever I could to bond with her. I wanted her bonding with me, and not with TV characters. Today, Noodle can happily sit down and watch TV. Sometimes, I'll let her watch PBS kids stuff by herself while I blog, or read. But she still likes to call for me every 10 minutes to make sure I'm paying attention. Plus, we still limit how much she can watch (although she loves Extreme Home Makeover and Dancing with the Stars and American Idol). However, I was still surprised at these parents' reaction to Didi's statement that we didn't let the Noodle watch TV. "We play with her. What do you do?" Now Didi didn't really say it in that way, although I wasn't there, and she's pretty sassy and I wouldn't put it past her. But still, for a parent to ask, "What do you do with her?" sounds like you've got a pesky dog that just wants to play fetch all the time. So what's this all about? Last night, I turned on the TV and watched history in the making. For the first time in 47 years, Cuba has a new president. Sure, it's Raul, Fidel's bro, but that's huge. There was partying in the streets of Little Havanna, and coverage on every channel, except E! News, which was covering Mel Gibson's fall from the crucifix, I mean, grace. To understand, you have to be Cuban, or from south Florida, to really understand the magnitude of this event. I wonder if I can now buy this shirt? Also, see this shirt. Either way, it got me thinking. So I decided to create a sort of "meme" on the top 10 events I watched live on TV. There were a lot more, and I think I probably left some big ones out (MTV's launch into TV stardom). But these were the ones that came to mind first. 1986 Space Shuttle Challenger explosion. I was in elementary school and we watched it live because there was a teacher going up into space. I remember watching it launch, explode, and then our teacher quickly turned off the TV and took us out to the playground. 1989 The fall of the Berlin Wall. I didn't fully understand the big deal. But, I realized this was a historical event. There were people on top of the wall and giant slabs of spray painted concrete falling everywhere. A year later, my history teacher came to school with a chunk of the wall he'd visited. 1989 The World Series Earthquake. This was the "Battle of the Bay" between the Oakland A's and the San Fran Giants. I am a Giants fan. And since I'd lived near San Fran I took a keen interest in this World Series. I remember watching the TV and suddenly, before the game actually started, the TV went blank. 1991 Gulf War - Persian Gulf War invasion. I was mesmerized by the nightvision tracers of anti-aircraft artillery streaming across the screen. I couldn't imagine flying through that, and trying to pinpoint bomb certain areas. I can only imagine what it was like when the Vietnam war was first broadcast on live TV and in color. 1992 The LA / Rodney King riots. The image of the truck driver having his head smashed by a brick will forever remain in my mind. The fires, the looting, the sheer animalistic violence by all involved. I couldn't believe they didn't find those officers guilty. 1995 OJ Trial / Run, Bronco, Run. I have always thought he was guilty. And to see him run like that was proof enough for me. I remember all the SNL spoofs, the jokes, the glove, and of course, the racism on both sides. 2000 Our Election Debacle Part I. I stayed up late watching the returns. I was hoping the returns weren't right, no they're wrong, no they're right. No, I'm pretty sure I voted correctly. But what about Florida? Did they? And to think, he got in twice. 2001 September 11th. I was teaching, and Didi text messaged me "The Pentagon is on fire." I turned on the TV and just froze when I saw the second plane hit the tower. I couldn't believe what was happening. At the same time, I knew we were going to war. 2003 Space Shuttle Columbia disaster. I was at home and just happened to turn on the TV and saw this bright light streaking across the sky. I'd seen in person a shuttle landing before, and knew this wasn't a good sign. Images of the Challenger accident popped into my head, and I knew the astronauts were gone. 2006 Fidel Castro relinquishes power. I've explained this already. It looks like the end for Fidel. His brother Raul isn't in the best of health either, and now it's only a matter of time before both these leaders are out, and hopefully a better leader will be "elected" in. Okay, so that's my "meme" I've created. I know my dates are skewed, primarily because I wasn't adopted until 1977, and also because I didn't watch much news until I was in 5th and 6th grade. I tag MetroDad, DIASL, Jae-ran, Ji-in, and Soon-Young. I also tag all my lurkers and other readers to add their TV events in my comments page. I also tag my Didi, but that's only because I like touching her butt.